I’ve never been the cool kid at school, the only times I got to sit at the back of the school bus was when nobody else had or was going to. I rarely got invited to the parties and if I did, I was the kid with the glass of fanta, hiding in a corner, wondering what’s so special about coca cola and why, no matter how hard I tried, I just couldn’t fit in. Why the other kids didn’t find interesting all the stuff I found amazing, and why it is so damn hard to be a kid sometimes.
Those are the years our character starts to develop and the level of self-confidence and consciousness is set in stone. But when you haven’t been the cool kid in the past, most of the times you won’t automatically develop what in fact looks like an innate cool attitude towards the world and the people around you as a grown up. You can, but it won’t come easily.
You’ll have to work hard on yourself, you will have to write daily on a piece of paper (and then re-read) all the reasons why you adore yourself, what makes you who you are and what aspects of your personality you can still work on and make better.

Photo by Christine Burns Photography

Every little criticism towards your personality will most likely hurt you, no matter if it’s coming from friends, family, people that very much love you, or from people that don’t quite like you, and the thing I used to envy a bit in those who were the cool kids was the ability to look past these criticisms and carry on with their lives as if no one had said a thing.
The difference is, because of that teeny tiny amount of pain in your chest you will experience when someone will tell you you’re being stubborn, selfish or wrong in any other way, you’ll be somewhat inclined to mull over that comment and analyse yourself, wondering if they’re right this time.
Are they? If they aren’t, there still might be something about you that set that feeling off in them.
And if there is, or if they were right from the very beginning, you will have the very precious chance to learn to take the hit and work on yourself to improve that side of your personality.

I kid you not when I tell you this is a very enjoyable process, a process that makes growing up and learning actual fun. The feeling of pride and satisfaction you’ll get upon acknowledging you are able to improve yourself without getting your feathers all fussed up is something I wouldn’t change for any school bus back seat, afternoon party spotlight or volleyball teams first pick.

Photo by Christine Burns Photography

Does the feeling of inadequacy ever go away?
Sometimes it does, sometimes it doesn’t. If you run a small business that requires you to meet clients and selling your persona as well as your products and services, your shyness will scare you only if you let it be a problem.
Being shy isn’t a problem, giving up to shyness might be.
There are tons of shared advices about how much of your personality and self-confidence your body language and facial expression give away, so I’ll assume you already know that smiling, keeping your arms open and avoid to nervously twiddling your thumbs when talking to someone who wants to work with you can help a great deal, but what I found particularly helping along these little visual precautionary things, is to breath deeply and focus on why I’m there.

Every time I sit in front of a couple who would like to book me for their wedding day, my first thoughts instinctively are ‘How do I look? Does my face look too puffy for their taste? What if they hate my voice?’ but as soon as I realise panic is having the best of me, something magical happens: panic goes away and I instantly remember that if they wanted to meet up because they are somewhat interested in my work, chances are they already like me.

So I only make sure I do one thing: showing them how passionate I am about what I do and what an hopeless sucker I am for love stories, families and new things. Meeting with couples that have just gotten engaged and are basically starting to build the foundations of their future and their family, simply and sincerely excites me and all I do is let my excitement show. I do love being around people in love, and if that means playing with the teaspoon or do little bum-jumps on my chair then that’s fine. I want my couples to know I care about them and that I am more interested in their experience with me than I am in making sure I sound confident enough when stating my prices.

There are tons of wedding photographers out there who are just as passionate and driven as you are, who probably take amazing pictures and charge less than you do, so you only have one thing that will be 100% original and that only you can offer: yourself. Show them how much you care, show them that your confidence comes from knowing how good you are at what you do and how much, in this job,  precious and important it is to be driven by an honest interest in their day.
Things have changed, the person you are and the work you have done on yourself should be the main reason why those clients will love you and book you. What you are reflects on your work, so never stop trying to improve yourself.

I’ll also have you know I love coca cola now.

♥

Thanks to the amazing Mia and Christine for the wonderful pictures xx

If you lovely lot are too on Instagram, I’m always happy to have nice imagery on my feed!
http://instagram.com/glareusy

“I am more excited about our Two’s Day than I was for our wedding!”
This is the last thing Alessandra told me the evening before meeting up at her place, a rather lovely cosy house in the south of London where she lives with her 1 year husband. You might remember them from their wedding last year in Naples and because I rarely miss a chance to mention Alessandra and to sing her praises as she is one talented lady.
Every time I had the opportunity to work with her and Salvatore, they’ve been the loveliest people and that morning they made no exceptions. I was welcomed by coffee and Nutella pancakes. Their tiny bright kitchen made for the cosiest atmosphere and the calmest of the mornings.
We had the luck to get a warm and sunny day, probably the very first Spring-y weekend of the year, and so we got in the car and drove to one of Ale and Salvo’s favourite spots in London: Herne Hill Farmers’ Market, followed by the second coffe of the day and a stroll in Brockwell Park.
I bloody love these two.

We were trying to avoid the mass of tourists that crowded the main roads, when we stumbled upon a Nostalgia shop which had a window that was brilliantly decorated for Easter.
They surely enjoyed torturing those poor fake chicks:

The Flower Market certainly was one of the bits I found more cute. There is no saying how much I like tiny cacti -especially when they’re blooming- and there was a whole selection of the sneaky pretties! How I managed not to grab ten of them and bring them all back to London is beyond me.

Despite my face literally melting under the amount of sneezes I was able to muster per minute, and the quite annoying temperature that I was running as if I were in a marathon, we couldn’t possibly skip a visit to the fair in Dam Square. Whoever has had the unfortunate pleasure to meet me and exchange a few words, weirdly knows how much I am attracted by little lights and cute things.
And there were a lot of little lights and cute things. Namely – bears. There were a lot of bears.

I must have really pulled myself together because after the fair we decided to continue our evening and went for a nice walk complemented by a set of yummy tapas in a very cosy and nice restaurant at the top of the Damrak. We met a cat who tried to bite my fingers and, by doing so, lifted my ill spirit a tiny bit.

That nice walk and fresh air…really kicked my butt. The morning after I was feeling worse than ever and all we could manage was a short walk in the park at the golden hour.
Good job I had my earmuffs!

This concludes the first Bear & Panda Around the World episode – title TBC.
I’m really hoping next time neither me or Bear will have the unlucky star we had on this trip. But hey! I’m also having a great year so…not complaining!
A few more pictures will probably hit the Facebook page or Flickr. Also, stay tuned for those taken by the Bear, he’s good!

SHOULD I FEED MY WEDDING PHOTOGRAPHER?

Yes. Yes, you should.
Providing a meal for your wedding vendors is unfortunately something that isn’t always considered and budgeted for when planning a wedding but it is undoubtedly one of the things that, if taken into its rightful consideration, can help boost the relationship with the people who are working hard to make your special day exactly this – special.
For wedding coverages that last more than 6 hours, a meal should be provided to your photographer and his/her assistant. You don’t want them all tired out and hungry during the final part of your day, and they surely should be allowed a break to rest, back up your images, and grab a bite.

If you can not provide a meal for your vendors, most photographers will leave the venue and go fetch themselves something to eat. This is an acceptable options, but the photographers might miss some important moment of your wedding breakfast (maybe someone will stand up for an impromptu speech?).
Nobody likes to have pictures taken whilst they’re chewing on tasty treats, so this is the perfect time for a photographer to sit down and breathe. However, should something worth photographing happen during a meal, a good photographer will pause his/her break and grab the camera to capture that moment. This becomes slightly hard if he/she is somewhere else buying food.

WHAT SHOULD I FEED MY WEDDING PHOTOGRAPHER?

Honestly, I personally don’t mind what my meals consists of as long as there is one and it’s edible.
If your photographer does, however, require a hot meal (or the same breakfast option your guests are having) might be because of the following reasons:

• They’ve been eating vendors’ meals (usually sandwiches) every day of every weekend of every year from early spring to early autumn.
• They had horrible experiences in the past where the sandwiches that were supposed to be fed to the vendors had been sitting outside for hours resulting in dry, bitter-tasting pieces of bread, hardly appealing (you’d be surprised to know how many times this happens).
• They might have some dietary requirements that clash with the usual vendor’s meal option.

If your photographer has included a specific option about the meal required in the contract, he/she probably has a good reason. In any case, you shouldn’t be afraid of asking for clarification. Some just wouldn’t be feeling valued and respected enough with a cheap meal option. Whether this is or isn’t relevant to you, it’s just a matter of seeing things differently, and the important thing is to have you and your photographer both happy with whatever is decided.

I’D LIKE TO PROVIDE MY VENDORS THE SAME OPTION AS MY GUESTS BUT IT’S QUITE EXPENSIVE. 

Before panicking, check with your venues whether or not they have a guest-option for vendors. It usually consists of the same meal toned down. Some catering services will be happy to provide the main course as meal option for vendors for a discounted price (starters, dessert and spirits won’t be included to reduce the price).

Bottom line is, talk with your vendors in advance and agree on an option each party is happy with. A happy photographer is a good photographer.

When James asked me to be his and Nicole’s photographer I was overwhelmed with joy. I knew they were going to get married in December, fairly close to Christmas, and I do like winter weddings and all the magic that Christmas’ little lights around London can create.
Rather a fantastic opportunity to witness all kind of happiness in one afternoon and create some beautiful imagery too.
That rainy and chilly morning, after having her hair done at the Haus of Hair (lovely place, and they have the cutest little dog ever!), we all headed back to the hotel where Nicki was getting ready, Josie was working her magic and I was snapping around the room. Nicki had baked very cute shortbread cookies for all of us, which made me very happy. I like cookies!
The Old Marylebone Town Hall was the place where Nicki and James exchanged their vows in presence of James’ dad and Nicki’s best friend only, the prettiest of the Christmas trees illuminated the room and, as usual, I wept.
As I did later on that day in Winter Wonderland…
This being the English Registry Ceremony, James & Nicki will have a second wedding this August in Germany and all their friends and relatives will be there to celebrate with them, I am so impatient you wouldn’t believe it! I love these guys to the moon and back.

What James wrote about his and Nicki’s back-story was just too beautiful and sweet to re-phrase it myself in the attempt of making it shorter. Simple notions and yet there is so much more than what you’ll read below…

“Best to start at the beginning.

Dress: Fashionart
Shoes: Helen Billkrantz
MUA: Josie Heighton-Towers

This particular one, however, got me smiling a bit more than the others:

The smell of my mum’s roccocò blending with the scent of honey coming from the struffoli, which I hate (the honey, not the struffoli). Setting up the Christmas tree with mum, looking at the cats destroying it two minutes later. Setting it up again and so on, getting to February with no intentions of putting it away. The house full of colours. The popping sound coming from the fireplace. Family, presents…including the bad ones from my aunt. I love my aunt’s ugly presents. They’re usually wallets, I have a drawer full of empty wallets.
Chocolate, the oven always on, ignoring homework and not feeling guilty about it. Memories.
The memory of granddad, a very classy man, always suited up even at home in the afternoon, even with no guests over. The range of pastries he went to get, the Chocolate Sciù he knew was my favourite.
Writing letters to Santa, playing Lego with my cousins and my brother, the little poem read out loud standing on a chair in front of my relatives.
Sitting on the couch with my parents and my brother watching TV -which only happens at Christmas- watching Natale in Casa Cupiello by Eduardo De Filippo, always the same but always moving.

I could go on listing all that I love about Christmas, but I believe the following being the main ones: Vongole spaghetti, ‘o pezzullo & Baccalà with its distinctive smell that can infest the whole house, the insalata di rinforzo, oven baked maccheroni, lemon friarelli, mussels impepata, Christmas menestella, rise sartù, insalata russa, tomato meatballs, eel, the Casatiello, the Cassata, almond pastries, dried fruit, nuts, susamielli, mustaccioli, the infamous struffoli and roccocò (necessarily soaked in wine). Some fruit to wash it all away.

All of the above eaten in less than two days, And now I’m hungry.

I have chosen this comment among all that were left on my previous blog post because of how Franz got carried away with the food talking. Mainly. And although I do love food and this would be a good reason alone, what I really liked was the honesty and simplicity about how food (especially in Italy and especially in the south – where he comes from) plays a massive part in festive families reunions. Being a southern Italian myself it wasn’t hard for me to picture the enormous amount of tasty treats most families delight themselves with over Christmas. And the perfumes that invade a busy kitchen are what we tent to remember the most, without even realising it. Christmas has the scent of what is traditionally cooked in a family for the occasion.
And Franz’s entry perfectly portrayed all of this.

And now…the prize draw!

http://www.random.org/lists/ was used to create the list of entrants and randomize the orde; the first name on top of the list is the winner!

Ready?

Click Me!

Yaaaaaay! Congratulations! Get in contact to claim your prize and thanks a lot for taking part everyone ♥

For those who don’t know yet, one of my biggest dreams is to be Santa’s little helper (not the dog version though) and to travel all over the world on a sleight at night, freezing my ears and pouring thick super glue on all the naughty people’s heads whilst my partner (we have a thing going on) takes care of the presents for all the nice kids out there who didn’t throw rocks at cats or pull their crush’s hair.
But as I’m struggling to find a nice red sweater that won’t make me look like a potatoes sac I think I’ll have to pass this year and organize my little present giveaway on my own.

So…there you go!

Starting tomorrow December the 1st at 00:00 until December 31st at 23:59, you’ll get a chance to win a 50mm f/1.8 lens for your Canon or Nikon Camera!

And if you don’t use Canon nor Nikon or already posses the aforementioned lens, despair not for I have an option for you too. You’ll find more details by reading the T&C for this competition.

How do I enter?

It is quite simple really, for each of the following actions you’ll get a spot on the entrants list. The more of the followings you do, the more chances you have to be the lucky one.

• Go on Facebook and share a link to this blogpost on your wall, be sure to tag the Facebook Page so I’ll know you’ve entered (+1 spot)
•  Go on Twitter and share a link to this blogpost. Don’t forget to do use the hashtag #TeeTeeGiveaway or the entry won’t be considered valid! (+1 spot)
• Come back here and leave a comment in which you let me know if you have entered on Facebook and Twitter too, and tell me what is it that you love about Christmas (+1 spot). The person who’ll manage to move me a bit (it really doesn’t take much to make me weep…I’m a weak emotional chicken) will get 3 extra spots on the list. Because we’re all about emotions here mate.

On January the 15th, a winner will be picked randomly from the list of entries, I’ll then get in touch with you and arrange the dispatch of your free lens.

TeeTee (who’s really pulling off its Santa outfit) will be managing the super original and most catchy hashtag #TeeTeeGiveaway on Twitter for you, as I count the entries on the blog and on Facebook.

By entering this competition you agree to the Terms & Conditions, remember that, folks!

Merry Christmas!

But yeah, here’s this month’s pinning. And stay tuned as I’ll soon be sharing a lovely Two’s Day ♥

Source: strictlyweddings.com via Martina on Pinterest

Source: stylemepretty.com via Martina on Pinterest

Source: stylemepretty.com via Martina on Pinterest

Source: weddingchicks.com via Martina on Pinterest

Source: stylemepretty.com via Martina on Pinterest